My experience of dealing with polarities has led to the understanding that they only exist as opposites in the mind! There, they are certainly contradictory. Outside of the THOUGHTS of good and bad (= outside the mind), they are complementary! Night and day – as with good and bad – aren’t two separate things; they are deeply joined together.
And certainly to connect with our hearts is a way to be outside the mind! And the only way I know of really doing this is to connect with the silence and stillness inside of us through meditation.
So for me, meditation has become the key. It opens the door to greater awareness and clarity.
Now, when I remember, I stop trying to “become” something, which just creates another polarity in the mind (who I am now vs. who I want to become)! And in those moments when I relax into who I am – in that relaxed, accepting space – I have found that doing what I had perceived of as “good” happens without any notion of good or bad – and without any effort! What a paradox!