The easiest – and perhaps ONLY – way to experience acceptance, is to discover and allow ALL aspects of the mind to have a seat at the “board table!” By that, I mean experience the situation and let ALL the parts of the mind have space to express how they feel about a particular situation.
I dropped my favorite bowl and it broke. If I ask, “Can I accept this?” I may find myself uncomfortable, sad, maybe even angry. And, if I am truthful, I would have to say, “No.”
But here’s where the trickiness of the mind comes in. It says, “There is no use in being sad about it. Don’t ‘cry over spilled milk.’ You can get another one.” What this internal voice is doing is suppressing the other part of the mind that feels sad or angry. It doesn’t give that part space to be real and feel the emotions that are there.
Once I experience this, I can ask, “So, I’ve broken my favorite bowl. And a part of the mind is upset by this, and another part wants to move on. Can I accept this?”
Now the answer might be “Yes.” And then there is a feeling of acceptance that comes. It permeates the body…there’s a feeling of relaxing into the situation.
However, if I look a little deeper, I may still have ANOTHER part of the mind that is angry at the second part for trying to suppress the first part! In that event, I can ask, “OK, I’ve broken my bowl. A part of the mind is upset by this, another part wants to move on, AND a third part is angry at the part that wants to move on!”
At SOME point, I will find the bigger picture of what is going on. And when I do, I find a genuine acceptance of it! It is allowing ALL the parts of the mind to be present and accounted for that gives me this feeling of acceptance…because IT IS THE TRUTH OF WHAT IS HAPPENING!
So, the next time you find yourself in a situation where you are in the process of “acceptance,” give this understanding a try and experience what happens!
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